the far over due blog about lochlan.

so almost everyone knows about him, almost everyone knows about ben too, but there are still a lot of people who dont. so, lochan alexander hehr is a ginger who goes to millard south. his virginity is one of the two ive stolen and i can honestly say i loved him with everything i had.

~hey ben, i know youre going to read this and be like what the fuck, but you know all of this so get over it i guess. oh and for anyone who doesnt know ben is the other virginity ive stolen and he stole mine too because he sucks at... nevermind~

anyhow, me and lochlan met last year at millard south's home coming, i was there with lys and he was there with giselle. we stayed in touch, added each other's myspace's then giselle dumped him. at this point i had started dating ryan. the first night i got high was the first time lochlan told me he liked me, well, he had giselle do it. i told him it'd have to wait until me and ryan were done but it didnt. back then i was a major cheat. me and lochlan talked on the phone and emailed and everything. one night me, ryan, and other people were supposed to go to the movies and ryan didnt want to see hsm3, none of us did we just wanted to screw around. so ryan didnt go, but lochlan andy and matt went, which brings us to lochlan randomly kissing me and me not exactly telling him to stop. i broke up with ryan the next day and me and lochlan were dating at that moment.

~i honestly feel horrible about the ryan thing still, but uhm, oh well.~

we dated for a while, broke up (because of giselle), got back together, had that lovey dovey sex you see in the movies with the eye contact. dyed his hair black, got Christmas presents i made him promise he wouldnt buy me, it was great, i saw him every weekend, talked to him every night, even emailed non-stop. id never once thought about cheating on him, i honestly dont think i would have been able to, i was like super duper in love with him.then it was just over. there was really no reason other than he just stopped liking me all together. it was fucking horrible and i still cry when i think about it. he hates me and i didnt do anything.

~still somehow im very attracted to gingers.~

its been a while, he was my first everything of the new year, like seriously he walked to lys's house just to kiss me at 12. last time i had sex it was before i dyed his hair on new years day. so im scared of this new year, ive kind of figured out not to cry when thinking about it all, i mean its been almost a year... but i know im going to start the new year crying because he isnt there. i guess all i can do is wait until i love somebody more than i loved him, and keep hating him with every fiber of my being. the end.

~ben you dont get one of these, we're too complicated for anybody to understand if they wernt there. sorry kid~