something isnt right right now, i want to cry but i cant. today was supposed to be good, today was supposed to be the best, all i got out of it was a half hour of crying in front of block buster and a depressing yet uplifting movie about donnie darko's sister. if i said i was happy id by lying. im nothing, if something were to happen to me who would care? im invisible and i dont know what to think of it anymore, i dont know what to think of myself... i would do almost anything to be happy, really happy. i cant even the pills dont make me happy...
none of them including myself know what to think of me, call me the family fuck up, i take after my mother, the only difference is im fat. i want to be something more than what i am but how? they all just judge, they dont know me and they never will. i just want to be happy... i just need to be something more. who can i go to now? im alone again. im alone everywhere. im so worthless. i cant win. i cant do thins now... explanation later.
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